Choosing to Prevail

Well, hello there!

Life sure is interesting, hey?

Yeah. Yeah, it is.

But it is what we make of it.

For the last several weeks, I have been choosing to prevail. No matter what the situation, I choose to prevail with love in my heart.

Do you know what happens when you do that?

You come out with more than you could have expected. You find more meaning in life. You have gratitude every day.

For instance, Brady P goes to his dad's house on weekends in the summer time. Those weekends are my chance to be Amanda -- whatever that means for me that particular weekend.  Whatever I want to do or clean or paint or fix or see.

It really helps keep me balanced.

Last Wednesday night, Brady P came down with a fever. Yikes! I asked the neighbors and other families if they had experienced anything similar lately, and the consensus was, yes, a 24-hour tummy bug.

So he was still fevering on Thursday, and since Aaron has a wife and small child, it was not fitting for Brady P to enter their home until things were settled.

We worked it out so that I would keep him for the weekend.

MY weekend!

At first I was really bummed, and thought, "this isn't fair!"

But it was the right thing to do, so it didn't matter if I thought it was fair or not. That's life. Do the right thing, gosh darn it!

As I let that idea settle, I really became okay with it. We spent the whole weekend together and now the first week without school because he still has a cough (not Covid, at least!).

So here I am, taking care of this little boy for much longer than I thought with all my plans foiling while I got sick too.

Do you want to know what?

We had a great time!

We had so much fun together going for walks, being zombies, playing new games, playing in the yard and just plain being present with each other.

Instead of being bitter about my situation, I embraced it. When I am at peace, he is at peace, and we really enjoy each other's company. We laugh and do goofy things and learn and dance and eat good food and cheers our drinks and snuggle and just enjoy life the way it was meant to be.

I am grateful.

So, this potentially "ruined" weekend turned out to be a real growing moment for us. My conscious attitude shift was key.

And of course, my determination to prevail has been quite helpful as well.

Because when you choose to prevail with love in your heart and the best of intentions, you prevail. And when you keep doing that, you realize that there is no better way to live.

At least that's where I'm at. Maybe you already choose that path. If so, we will probably meet up on it. Cheers!

This is the face before the Zombie comes out!

The Key to Our Hearts

The other day, B and I were at a friend's big 4-0 birthday party.  It was mostly adults with a couple other kiddos running around, but the focus was on the adults.

Except for mine because I was in charge of Brady P. My focus is always stuck on him when I am in charge.

Cuz he's fast.

And I am probably a bit overly-dedicated.

But this was a really wonderful group of people, and the more I looked around at the happenings, the more I noticed how much other people focus on him as well.

For instance, Auntie Abbie brought him a plate of snacks when she saw him lazing out on the couch. I was so grateful for her thoughtfulness.

Most people notice when he flees the scene, and they'll either run after him or shout, "There he goes!"

That helps me relax a bit in social settings. For that, I am also grateful.

Then there was this special moment when Brady P. got to bring the birthday girl her cake while we sang. The look on her face as she noticed what was going on really struck my heart. It was as if she was honored that he was the one bringing her cake (even though he really wanted to eat it!)

They sat next to each other and ate cake and ice cream. The people around interacted with him verbally, and laughed at his shenanigans.

It warms my heart to see him interacting this way because I no longer have to be the translator all the time. He can converse. People can ask him the questions, not me.

As the people around him laughed at his antics while he indulged in his favorite part of a birthday party, the birthday girl looked over at him and said, "I'm so glad to know you, Brady."

She said a couple other sweet things too that I can't remember well enough to quote because I was just so stricken with pride.

I guess pride would be the word, but it's me being proud of him.

Then we watched as he put his hand on her cheek and looked up at her sweet face and told her he loved her.

I teared up.

I think she did too.

It is such an enchanting experience to be the mother of someone who makes people smile and warms people's hearts and souls.

It overwhelms me to see how much love and energy people put back into this little boy based on the love they feel from him. It is proof that love can break the mold, love can heal people's hearts and love will help us help the world.

Brady P holds the key. Is your heart ready?

He can even charm reptiles

My Little Ninja

Hi!

Our neighbors are really cool, and they ordered an American Ninja Warrior line for our backyard. We have the space, and they have the stuff, so it all work out.

Mr. Braeden has tried it a few times, and I have already seen significant improvement in his endurance, balance, strength and confidence.

Here is a little video. My favorite part is the giggles at the end.

Have a great week!

Still Rockin' It

Hey!

I hope you're doing great.

We sure are! It's been such a wonderful summer. I think we're making the most of it, and that means a lot because snowblowing season is not far off... and that one seems longer. Ha!

Town sure is busy, but it's the last hurrah before most students go back to school -- if they haven't already!

Brady P and I still manage to find some solitude up here though. We know some of the secret spots, and we take full advantage.

He absolutely loves to hike the trails, especially when there's a beach or two or three on the offshoots.

"Mummy, look it! A beach! My favorite!" he'll shout like someone just gave him a pony. I absolutely love his zest and gratitude for anything remotely joyful. It sure helps me remember it too!

So we've been sure to find new places to throw rocks and hike. It keeps life exciting, you know? And it breaks him out of his routine bubble a bit. He is really a man of tradition, so it's nice to see him curious and seeking new things.

Like actually wading into Lake Superior! It's finally warm enough for more than a cool-off plunge. I'm so glad he enjoys that because it sure has been hot!

And there are always rocks to throw.

Always.

Yoga on the Planks

Hi there!

Last week was pretty stressful, but I am prevailing!

Brady P could tell I was stressed, and he became stressed too.

Then one afternoon, he took the initiative to resolve it. The power of his intuition and magic never cease to amaze me.

"Mummy, let's go for a walk!" he proclaimed tugging my arm towards the woods.

"Braeds, we promised to meet a friend right now," I argued. "Let's at least go home, so I can let her know."

"No, Mummy. Let's go for a walk." And off he went.

After a few deep breaths and an internal struggle, I gave in. He was not budging, and the only way I would get him to turn around was if I threw him over my shoulder kicking and screaming.

That was not necessary.

And, little did I know, he had a plan.

He took me to see the horses (who have really taken a liking to him, I might add). Then we walked around the meadow.

He lead us to a pond and up another trail that goes up and up the ridge.

"Oh boy," I thought. "How far up is he going to take me?"

By that time I was starting to give in to the fact that I would be following a six-year-old on a mission for the next unknown amount of time.

We went up and up. I was kind of hoping he'd get tired and want to go back down, but no dice.

Finally, somewhere in the middle of one of the Keweenaw's longest boardwalks, he stopped and announced, "Mummy, let's do yoga!"

Then, right there, on a stretch of elevated planks, Brady P lead me in a yoga session.

"Okay, now stand up! Arms out! Sit down and hug your knees. No, like this," he said, wiggling his hands until I got it just right.

We contorted ourselves and breathed. I adjusted my hands to his liking, and we breathed.

After sitting up from a laying down position, I looked down the boardwalk. The planks descended and curved out of sight. The thimbleberry bushes contrasted the gray conglomerate walls with brightness and life.

And I was in the middle of a yoga session with the coolest person I know.

I shed a couple tears.

I felt a weight off my shoulders. I felt peace so deep in my bones that all the stress released. It could no longer penetrate me. I became peace.

All thanks so Brady P. He knew I needed that. And he delivered it.

Perfectly.

My gratitude for that little boy and that moment overtook me. I have been much better since.

And so has he.

Thank you, my little yogi!

Not a yoga pose, but one of his most famous positions!

What Bonds Us

In this town, people flock to visit during the time of year when they can do the things they love to do. And as the saying goes, "Birds of a feather flock together." So when people meet each other at a restaurant, bar or outdoor gathering, they usually mention what they are up here for (if it is not already apparent by their apparel).

People who rode up on motorcycles love to talk to other people who are up on their bikes. They will probably buy each other a drink and become friends and exchange numbers before the night is through. 

Same with people who pulled into the bay on a sailboat. They will talk boats and ask where else they have been and where they're going next. Same with people on mountain bikes. People who tour the UP camping. People who went to Isle Royale. Etc, etc.

Having Brady P in my life has also taught me that other people who have a special person with that extra 21st chromosome in their life flock together as well.

B and I have made a few friends based on this fact alone. We are able to chat for long periods of time, nodding and smiling, because we also have that common interest that has taken over our hearts.

We have had people recognize us from this blog, and it's always nice to meet you. 

We have also had people who know nothing about us, but they will just stop and talk to Braeden to bask in his glory. "Kindred spirit," they will say with no other explanation. Or, "I had a sister," they will nod.

Just like motorcycles and sailboats, this common thread makes us feel bonded before we even speak. It's so refreshing to watch how people connect from a spark like this.

I'm grateful for the new relationships I've found, and I relish in how the simple act of Brady P's smile and "Hi, how's it going?" can make someone's day.

It's neat to watch this happen between strangers. It's fun to feel it happen to myself. And it's apparent to me that, in all realness, we actually have more in common than we know.

We are humans on this planet.

There is a lot to talk about with another human simply because that's what we all are. 

We ALL are!

My and Brady P's mission is to help people believe that.

Thanks for being part of our mission!

My toothless wonder fast asleep.

Sometimes a tuckering out and an old-fashioned rock-a-bye is what bonds us.

Finding the Time

I don't think I really need to explain how difficult it is to find the time (and desire) so sit at a computer during the summer. There are so many other things to do!

So bear with me if posting is spotty.

Fortunately, life is good overall. Pretty wonderful, actually!

We sure could use some rain, but I think most states are in that boat. Especially those with the wildfires burning. My heart goes out to them!

B and I are just trying to make the most of the hot weather. Here is a pic of bubble time the other day. Brown grass and all. He is getting good at swinging that wand!

The berries are out! Bils and blues for sure. Raspberries and cherries as well. Thimbles are just starting.

And pretty much everybody who works in town is in a robotic state right now. "It's July," they shrug.

It's true. 

It's July.

Town is seriously busy, and that's how it goes.

I really do enjoy my new perspective of being a mother instead of a bartender this time of year.

Life used to be working crazy many hours each week serving  locals and visitors at a whirlwind pace. Now our biggest social interaction involves walking through town while little man says "Hi, how's it going?" to everyone. The life of a speedy server is something he can't even grasp, and I am happy for him. He then shares his perspective with me.

So I am happy for me! Ha!

Even with all the other jobs I have currently chosen to pursue, I am either working one-on-one or with small groups. It's quite a change from my early years in this town.

But it sure is uplifting to see my friends, who are running around in automatic mode (I know the feeling!), smile and take a moment to high five or hug little Brady P when we come around.

That is truly one of his best gifts: to remind us how important it is to take time for and acknowledge the ones we love.

Even when we don't think we have the time to do it.

Letting It Go

Brady P. is coming into this stage of development that is kind of shocking to me.

Not only is he exerting independence, but he is really blossoming his creativity and preferences.

As a mother who started this journey on high alert for health and safety, this has taken some getting used to. I actually have to consciously shift my attitude and priorities in order to allow him to manifest his individuality.

For instance: I usually just cook for us, set everything up for us and tell him when it's time to eat. But he really likes to help me (or anyone!) with whatever needs to be done.

So one day, while I was making lunch, he came over and said, "Mummy, let's have a picnic!"

It was a lovely day, and I need to let his ideas flourish, so I said, "That's a great idea! Let's get it ready!"

I set out a "picnic tray" and had him load his fork, his drink and some napkins. He did it all with pride in his step. When everything was finished, I carried the tray, and he helped me with the door.

"Mummy, right here," he said, so I knew where to set the tray down.

We had a nice little picnic in the sunshine. It was his idea, and he helped make it a reality!

On Monday, I took him into the co-op to get some groceries. I pulled out a shopping cart (they are smaller than most carts), and B said, "I push it!"

Well, off he went like a bat out of hell, and I had to reign him in and pull him back to the correct aisle. Then he took off again, stopped at the sale rack and put a bag of veggie chips in the cart... like he was in charge.

"Okay," I said, "we can eat those. They are two for $6, so do you want to pick out another bag?"

He picked out a different flavor. 

Nice. Okay. We can do this.

Then he zoomed off to the next sale rack, lifted a large bottle of avocado oil off the shelf and gingerly put it into the cart.

"Okay..." I said again. "I suppose we were going to run out soon anyway."

Then I figured I should just let him shop because he was picking out things that we actually use, and, well, they were on sale!

After we parked the cart in the produce section, he picked out carrots, cauliflower, broccoli, an apple and a watermelon. 

Some things we already had, but the things that were not on my list, I let him keep because that probably meant he would eat them. Good deal.

At the check out, he helped lift some items to the counter. What a little man he is. He is only 6 and a half, and he really enjoys doing the mundane things in life because, well, that's what people do!

As his mother, I need to let him.

And the more I let him, the more I see unfold. The more I see unfolding, the more he automatically does the dutiful things in daily life like get dressed and sit down to eat and take a tubby and so on.

It's as though the routine things that used to be a struggle are more automatic to him because he is able to branch out beyond the mundane in a more creative way.

It's awesome for me to watch it unfold for him and a relief for me to know it will happen.  I can just let some things go.

Especially the things I stuck into a pattern in my own mind. Releasing them has allowed him to be himself.

Ahhh, welcome to parenthood all over again!

Here's the welcome sign at our chiropractor office. He was a star there too because we just let him do his thing. He almost got hired as the assisstant!

Screen Time

Hi!

I apologize, but I have extra screen time to do for work and trainings, so staring at this screen right now just spins me out.

On a wonderful note, Brady P's heart check-up when great yesterday. "His repair was done very well (6 years ago) and just might hold for the rest of his life." ~ The Cardiologist

Woohoo!

See you when I see you!

We Are Not Alone

Hi!

How are you?

I hope this post finds you well. 

If it doesn't, make sure to talk to somebody about how you are feeling. They will listen!

If they don't, tell somebody else.

If it's something you have to complain about often, well, then maybe it's time for a change!

Easier said than done, but only you can change a part of your life that is bringing you down. It's not worth it to feel suppressed if you have the freedom to change your circumstances.

Believe me when I say that I have spent the last few years of my life making these changes for my own sanity and health. Right now I feel great, so that's promising. Until I get into the next learning experience I will soon need to get out of. 

Ha!

That's how life works.

I enjoy the ebb and flow. I am eager to keep learning about myself. I appreciate difficult situations that show me what my priorities really are.

I have even gotten to the point where extremely humbling, ego-shattering experiences bring me peace. They say, "That's not what life is about, Amanda! Humble yourself!"

And I do. It's so peaceful.

Peace is better than drama, 100%!

But I have also worked diligently to surround myself with support from friends, family and community. It's such an uplifting feeling, and I'm grateful!

I hope you have a good friend too. I really do! I hope you have at least one person you can depend on to lend an ear.

If you don't, please reach out to somebody else in your family, neighborhood, from high school or even a professional.

Heck, you can even shoot me an email!

Nobody should feel boxed up or alone.

Life isn't easy all the time. But when it is, be grateful and share it with others. When it's not, talk to those others.

That's what keeps us on a good path.

Okay, my sermon is done for the day! Enjoy your week!

Strawberry Fields For Real

Hi!

Brady P and I went to visit my parents for a few days.

With our timing, we scored the best time to pick strawberries at Glendale Farms.

I remember going there as a kid with my brother and sister (and parents, of course) and coming out of the fields with red hands, chins and shirts. I loved the tractor-pulled wagon ride that got us to our rows. 

It really is a cool experience, so I was tickled that we got to do it with my own little boy!

P.Pie in his row

The berries were BEAUTIFUL!

He found the BIGGEST one!

Waving from his tractor

That was really the gist of it. The tractor ride was my favorite part again... or maybe eating the berries... or maybe watching people's reactions to how charming this little boy is.

Have a great week!

Shaping Realities

Hi!

If you've read Digging for Light, you might remember a story where a teenage boy, who thought Brady P. was really cool, asked me what Down syndrome was. He had never heard of it.

Do you remember what I did? 

I totally flopped. 

I gave him a text book answer from the 1980's. Not very flattering for that extra 21st chromosome.

Well, today I was talking to a grown man about my son. After a while he said, "I don't really know what Down syndrome is."

I started with the typical extra 21st chromosome biology stuff, but I realized that doesn't really mean much to anyone unless they are in the medical or biology field.

Then I flashed back to that moment I flopped with the teenager. I realized that this was my moment to redeem myself! Someone who didn't know what it meant! How could I shape their reality?

In a mere second, I figured out how to break it all down into two parts. I took a deep breath and started.

"Well, I think there are two main components." I said. "For one, their brain is not really set up to learn and develop like most people do. They have to work really, really hard and do things many times before they really understand most concepts.

"For two," I continued, "I think they are more connected to some of the important things in life. They are better able to empathize with others, show unconditional love and be grateful and joyful in the moment."

There. I did it! And I think he understood.

It was really a neat moment in my life, I suppose. 

I just find it odd because I am a mother of someone who has that extra chromosome, so I take for granted that everyone knows what it is. And when somebody doesn't, I'm so shocked that I almost don't know what to say!

But I think that answer sums it up for the most part.

Then I went on to list some of Brady P's talents and ensured him that even people with Down syndrome are different amongst themselves just like all humans are.

Cuz we all are. And we should respect that.

Brady P. likes to take dogs for a walks. I don't really recommend his services yet because he is quite a leash yanker, but maybe he'll ease up someday... and get a job! Ha!

A Good Direction

Hey!

Nice to see you again.

I was pulling two to three times the hours on a computer in the office, and staring at my own computer was the last thing I wanted to do in the evening. So thanks for your patience.

Town is different since I saw you last. For many reasons, but, to name a few, the trees now have all their leaves, more businesses are open, more people are here and the black flies are out!

All good things, I suppose!

Brady P. is doing great. He gets to meet random people and charm them, so that's always heart-warming!

And it's certainly rock chucking season, so we've been down at the shores. It's wonderful for us both. I try to let him lead where we go and how long we stay. It's just easier for us both that way. I'm not one to promote stressful situations.

Life is good, though.

Braeden's dad is back up for the summer, so they get to spend time together. B-man sure loves to do guys things! I can't say I'm particularly good at them, so I'm happy they both get to do that for each other.

I really don't have anything profound for you at the moment. Just wanted to check in. I hope you are doing well and listening to your heart!

Because it will just keep trying to get your attention until you listen.

For real!

I got to go to Isle Royale too, by the way. For five days!

This is my favorite picture from the trip. We nosed the canoe north from Pickerel Cove, and this was the view. That is Lake Superior in utter calmness on the north shore. And if you look in the background between the middle island the the right side, you'll see Canada. Those are the legs of the "Sleeping Giant."

So things are heading in a good direction!