Morning Gem

Do you remember what it was like getting up early for school when you were a kid?

It was tortuously early and often still dark. Kind of a cruel trick, if you ask me. But here we go again.

Brady P does not like to get up for school. He wants to lay in his bed until breakfast is ready. It takes a great amount of coaxing to make him pee in the potty and get dressed. 

The most common words I hear on school mornings are: "No!" "Go away!" and "Just one more minute!" 

Ugh.

Luckily, he is a big fan of walking/running to school, so he will at least get out the door when we're ready.

Every victory counts.

On the weekends, it's a different story.

No alarms for either one of us. Another victory!

He wakes up with the light of day, gets out of bed, closes his door, closes the bathroom door and jumps into bed with me.

On those mornings, he is an absolute gem. So much that I had to write about it.

"Good morning!" he chirps as he climbs over me and rolls into his spot.

"Mummy! I had a dream last night!"

"Oh! What was your dream?" I ask.

Then he tells me his dream. It usually involves playing animals with his Grammy Linda and cousin Lauren, but he adds variations.

Then he asks, "What's your dream?"

You know, I dreamt, but I usually either can't remember or don't think it's appropriate to share. I'm just honest with him about that. He is disappointed, but he gets over it quickly.

Haha. Even when I remember my dreams, he is never too interested.

But there we are. Lying face to face. His adorable little cheeks are rosy and his smile is so bright.

He kisses my lips.

"I love you, Mum."

"Aww, I love you too, Dovie."

"I love you sooooooo much forever and ever."

"Oh, Honey, you are the sweetest!"

"You are the sweetest!" he says.

Then we snuggle closer and stare into each other's eyes. My heart fills with love, magic and gratitude. 

Wide eyes staring

I thank him everyday for coming into my life. I know he is the best gift I could have received in this lifetime, and being his mother is my greatest honor.

It can be difficult at times, but I wouldn't trade it.

Gratitude Forevermore

Happy Wednesday!

Things are looking up!  Hooray!

Gratitude is a huge part of having a wonderful life. Then you can have a good life pretty much wherever you are. Because you are grateful for what you already have.

That's a blessing right there, my friend.

An attitude of positivity combined with fortitude is also quite helpful. Sit in the driver seat of your life. Make your own decisions and goals. You have the accelerator, the steering wheel and even the brake.

You can change your mind.

When you listen to your body, heart and soul, this happens a lot.

It's okay to change your mind.

Only you know the truth in yourself. 

Seek it.

Pay attention.

The universe is talking to you everyday!

Okay, there's my little motivational speech for you. Thanks for reading!

Now how about something about Brady P?

I love that he is growing into such an amazing young man. I love that he is becoming such a good helper. He is definitely his spirited individual self, but I supposed that's better than the alternative.

He just keeps me and all his support team on our toes.

He says hello!

And life is good.

If you are grateful, then life is great!

The inner magic of a zinnia flower

I've been meaning to tell you that the platform I use to write to you no longer sends an email when I post, so you might have to click here every couple weeks to look for something new.

Cheers to a wonderful day!

Where Have You Been?

Hi!

Oh my gosh, I'm here this time!

How many times did you check here since the last post? 

HOW many? 

Jeez. Sorry if I disappointed you.

But let's explore that a bit... were you disappointed? Mad? Sad? Worried? Did you give up on me and you're now reading this in the year 2025?

What's your answer? How did you feel? How did you feel when your expectation was not met over and over again? What were your thoughts as you were trying today?

You don't have to tell me. Just tell yourself, and see how it fits in with the rest of your life. Gotta love a little self-reflection.

Ahhhh. 

Okay. Thanks for that.

The berries are coming out, and the lakes are mostly tolerably swimmable if you hit them on the right day and on the right shore. Ha!

We've had a pretty mild summer so far. Definitely not sweltering like last year. And we've finally been getting rain! It's such a relief to... wait, what? 

Oh, you don't care about the weather?

You are wondering why I didn't write to you for a month?

~Did I just read your mind? I won't tell you what else I know then. Wink.~

I got my second concussion of the year. Yeah, 2022 has been a real bruiser. I wasn't in the bathroom this time. I was on my bike. I smashed my face right into the road and rode on an ambulance to get my forehead sewn up. Oy!

Still not a noble way to end up in the ER, but I guess most of these accidents usually have an embarrassing story. Like, not a cool one. Just... I tipped over and broke my fall with my head... and not a helmet.

See? Not a cool story at all.

But I sure am grateful for the people who were around to save my life! I think I have already thanked them all. If not, THANK YOU!!!

Yup, I'm still alive. 

On Wednesday, July 6th, when I was supposed to be writing to you, I was crawling to the bathroom, drinking as much water as I could and even drinking my food because I could not really chew. Luckily, I could swallow Ibuprofen cuz that's what I had for the pain... and swelling.

The left side of my face was a purple balloon. I will spare you the picture of that. I don't want to gross you out unsolicited. You can't unsee things, you know.

But here is B-man watching the 4th of July Parade 

with his cute little bro!

So yeah, um, I didn't write that day. Or the following couple Wednesdays. But, I'm alive! Yay! So grateful! And I can still use all the parts of my body! 

I'm not yet ready for a mountain bike ride or other aerobic activities. They cash me out right away. I also am not really able to do all my office duties without crying that I am a failure. I'm also not really good at learning something new yet.

I need to rest. A lot. It's really taking away from my life. I can't even take B-man out most days because the sun makes me feel like I'm being pressed into the earth by a giant palm. That's annoying.

I have already done too much and then regressed big time. It is quite frustrating. This time around has been harder to recover from than the first head smash, but at least I have a little practice of how it might go.

I have a ways to go yet. Oy!

But I'll get there. As always... I will prevail!!!

Nice to see you. Is that a new shirt?

Pile of Kisses

I got my first concussion Tuesday night.

Not even a cool story. I wasn't drinking tequila. I wasn't break dancing. I wasn't snowboarding.

Nothing cool.

I was momming.

In the bathroom.

Yeah. So, after rinsing out a little boy's poop potty in the bathtub, I reached over to set it back in its Paw Patrol holder. I must have taken a step forward to do so because, on my spring back to change the faucet to shower mode, I CRACKED my forehead on the wall that divides the tub and toilet.

I saw a bright flash of light, heard my teeth gnash and bounced backwards.

Well, that was a shocker!

I grabbed my head and wailed a bit as I hung over the side of the bathtub. Brady P looked at me timidly. I don't think he saw exactly what happened as he was preoccupied with his animals (go figure).

I opened my eyes, and... and... I opened my eyes! I was conscious! Oh, happy day! My daylights were still burning!

I was immediately filled with gratitude. As I heard (and felt) my head smack a fortified tile wall, I thought for sure I should be a heap on the bathroom floor, leaving Brady P to wonder why he couldn't wake Mama up by shouting "Boo!"

He would have been on his own. And nobody would have known. (Side note: I am now prompted to teach him how and when to call 911 once I can do something productive again.)

I was quite euphoric about the fact that I was conscious. I rejoiced while I iced the lump on my head. I rejoiced while I rubbed Frankincense oil into my inflaming flesh. I rejoiced!

Then my mom called. 

I told her what happened. She is a nurse, and she is keen to these things, so she said, "Amanda, you might have a concussion."

I thought about that for a moment. I just re-certified my First Aid/CPR training, and I had the signs and symptoms for a concussion mostly memorized. But now I was embodying them.

"I guess that's why people don't diagnose their own concussion," I joked. "Yeah, coach. I'm fine! Put me back out there! Haha!"

But Mama Wais wasn't really laughing. She was becoming a bit concerned. We decided it was pretty mild, so she gave me a list of things to do and don't and wanted me to check back with her later.

Brady P kissed my bump as gently as he could. 

We made it though the night, and I managed to get him up and ready for school on time the next day.

The day was really rough. I felt like I got shot with a tranquilizer dart. I moved like a sloth. I talked in slow motion.

But I was alive!

Miss Liz dropped B off after school (That angel woman. I was not driving anywhere!).

After she left, I went over to snuggle by him on his little trampoline. He looked flattered.

"Mummy, let's take a rest together," he said, holding my neck.

In a moment, he got up. I stayed resting because that is what I did best that day.

"Here, Mummy! Here!" he was prodding.

I looked up, and he handed me my water glass. "Have a drink!" I was so flattered that I drank it all. "Oh! Good job!"

He took my cup away and brought my tea. "And here is your coffee," he said.

"Thank you, Brady!" I said. I took a little sip and set the cup down.

He was off to the next thing... and then back with his Guess Who card people.

I half-watched him as he took off the clip. I was still horizontal on the trampoline.

Then I felt a little card on my cheek. 

"This is Eric," he said.

"Did Eric just give me a kiss on my cheek?" I asked. 

"Mmm-hmm!" he confirmed.

"Thanks, Eric." I said, closing my eyes again.

Then I felt another card on my cheek. He told me who it was, and I thanked them for the kiss.

Well, that little boy when through the whole deck and had each one of our card friends kiss me on the cheek. Then he did the same thing with his own sweet little lips.

"I love you, Mummy."

My smooch pile

Seriously. What a little lover. This boy has so much love to share. I am extremely blessed to be a daily recipient of it. It will definitely help my head heal.

One day at a time. I am still alive... and loved.

Choosing to Prevail

Well, hello there!

Life sure is interesting, hey?

Yeah. Yeah, it is.

But it is what we make of it.

For the last several weeks, I have been choosing to prevail. No matter what the situation, I choose to prevail with love in my heart.

Do you know what happens when you do that?

You come out with more than you could have expected. You find more meaning in life. You have gratitude every day.

For instance, Brady P goes to his dad's house on weekends in the summer time. Those weekends are my chance to be Amanda -- whatever that means for me that particular weekend.  Whatever I want to do or clean or paint or fix or see.

It really helps keep me balanced.

Last Wednesday night, Brady P came down with a fever. Yikes! I asked the neighbors and other families if they had experienced anything similar lately, and the consensus was, yes, a 24-hour tummy bug.

So he was still fevering on Thursday, and since Aaron has a wife and small child, it was not fitting for Brady P to enter their home until things were settled.

We worked it out so that I would keep him for the weekend.

MY weekend!

At first I was really bummed, and thought, "this isn't fair!"

But it was the right thing to do, so it didn't matter if I thought it was fair or not. That's life. Do the right thing, gosh darn it!

As I let that idea settle, I really became okay with it. We spent the whole weekend together and now the first week without school because he still has a cough (not Covid, at least!).

So here I am, taking care of this little boy for much longer than I thought with all my plans foiling while I got sick too.

Do you want to know what?

We had a great time!

We had so much fun together going for walks, being zombies, playing new games, playing in the yard and just plain being present with each other.

Instead of being bitter about my situation, I embraced it. When I am at peace, he is at peace, and we really enjoy each other's company. We laugh and do goofy things and learn and dance and eat good food and cheers our drinks and snuggle and just enjoy life the way it was meant to be.

I am grateful.

So, this potentially "ruined" weekend turned out to be a real growing moment for us. My conscious attitude shift was key.

And of course, my determination to prevail has been quite helpful as well.

Because when you choose to prevail with love in your heart and the best of intentions, you prevail. And when you keep doing that, you realize that there is no better way to live.

At least that's where I'm at. Maybe you already choose that path. If so, we will probably meet up on it. Cheers!

This is the face before the Zombie comes out!

Like a Dream

Hey!

Sometimes you just don't know what to say, right?

In those moments, it might be better not to say anything at all! So that's what I did. Sorry I missed you.

I guess the most meaningful thing that I can tell you about right now is how sweet it is to snuggle with my little boy at night.

We get to snuggle up together pretty much every night during the chilly half of the year. That's a lot of bed time snuggles!

And each night (unless I have to exit sooner), I lay next to him until he falls asleep.

Soft lullaby music plays. My left hand rests across the right side of his body as he holds my face in his hands or rubs my eyebrow. We say "night night" and "love you so much" and "see you in the morning" and talk about the day and giggle for a bit.

Sometimes I sing him a song.

Then his breathing deepens and gets a touch louder. He falls asleep in my arms. 

I cherish that for a minute or two.

Then I make my escape. I slowly lift my left arm up. Then I take his soft, warm hand off my cheek, give it a kiss and lay it on his other hand on the pillow.

And wait...

to make sure he's still asleep.

Then I rise and slowly walk out of his room, closing the door and giving a nod of gratitude.

Whew.

I am amazed at how fast he will fall asleep sometimes. It does make me feel good to know that he feels so comfortable and relaxed around me.

That sweet little angel boy.

I know he won't want me to snuggle with him forever, and our first few years were a LOT of work to get him to sleep.

So this feels like a dream.

And I just wanted to share it with you.

Can't get his picture at night, so here's a fun frame nap shot

What to Choose...

Hello!

I might just be able to get here every other week for a bit, and that will be okay.  Sorry for any inconvenience it might cause.  I know you look forward to Wednesdays just for this post.  

Ha!

How are you doing?

Really!  How ARE you feeling?  Overall?  In everyday life?

I just want to remind you that, no matter how you are feeling right now, you are worthy.  You are worthy of love.  If you can freely give love to others, you deserve love freely from others.  

Unconditionally.

We all do.

That's why Brady P. is here.  To remind us of that.

Please don't let fear consume your life.  There is too much beauty and love out there to focus on something to be afraid of.  

There are two ways to act: out of love or out of fear.  Seriously. Those are the only two ways to make a decision!

Either you are hoping for the best and being your best in order to create the best outcome for all those involved, or you are holding back something due to fear.

Once I learned this (from a Gary Zukav book, I believe) I test it daily.

It has held true.  You can only act out of either love or fear.  Even if you say you are acting out of "rationale," your decision has to be either for the good of others or purely self-serving -- the latter is fear-based.

I don't know if I talked about this before, but it sure seems like a good time in our lives to bring it up again.

You don't even have to agree with me.  But you can test it as you go about your day!  If you find that you disagree, please tell me!  And if you find that it's true, and it has changed how you view life and make decisions on a daily basis, please tell me!

I don't know if you can tell, but I really want to help make a difference in this world.

I want you to be your best self, so I strive to be my best self.  I am trying to lead by example.  Remember, I am not perfect, and that's why I like to share my imperfections with you.  So you know I'm human too!

We all are!  

We're allowed to make mistakes! 

We're allowed to have hard days!  

We can only act according to the best of our ability in any given moment.  It is when we consciously make a decision to do the wrong thing even when we know what's right, that we feel negative repercussions.

It's true.  I test that out often too.  Instant karma, man.

But the consequences of doing the right things are amazing.  And the more you do the right thing, the better your life gets.  The more opportunities come your way.  The more your prayers are answered.

At least from what I've noticed.  That's why I'm telling you!

So test your choices for a bit: love or fear.  Ask yourself, "What am I choosing right now?  Am I being my best self?  I am I doing the right thing?  What if somebody was watching me do this right now?"

I'm not going to lie.  Often times, the right thing is the harder thing.  It takes more energy.  But what do you want to do with your life?  Move forward with the momentum of positivity or get stuck by doing the easy/convenient things that don't always get you anywhere?

The choice is yours, my friend.

Have a wonderful day!

Remembering Gratitude

Hey there.

How are you?

I know that things seem surreal and sometimes unfair, but let's remember what we're grateful for.  I can get really out of sorts and miserable when I forget the wonderful things in my life.

I bet you can too.

Here are some of the things I'm grateful for:

- I live in Copper Harbor in the fresh air with already quiet streets and a supportive community

- I have a wonderful man who loves me even though I haven't seen him in two weeks cuz the government says we're not supposed to

- My kid is really pretty awesome

- We still have enough food in the house to get through a few more weeks

- The General Store is still serving us locals who refuse to travel south

- We have clean water to drink

- The sun shines more often

- There are rocks to throw by the creek

- Overall, my heart is at peace, and I continue to grow and learn about myself and my place in this world

- The internet is working, so B and I can have conversations with other humans and see their smiles

- I can take a hot shower

- We are healthy

- My kid is seriously awesome

Thanks for listening.  This list is not complete, but it's a start.  

Have you written a list like this lately?  You should try it.  It will make you feel better.

Now for goofiness sake, here are some pictures of the things Brady P. has put on in the last week.  After wearing an over-sized/non-functional article of clothing one time, he understands why he won't wear it again, so I don't even have to tell him "no."

I learn best from my own mistakes, and I'll let him do that too.  As long as he is safe!

Mom's jacket and Grampy's hat

Mom's hat, gloves and boots!

Mom's sunglasses

A... wig???

At least there is never a dull moment.

Be grateful.  Be smart.  Stay safe, and stay at home.  Just do the right thing.  This is a good time to learn what that means.

See ya!

Leaps and Bounds

Tuesday I walked into the schoolhouse to pick up wee man, and the teacher started gushing to me about how awesome Brady P. did writing and spelling that day.

"What happened over the weekend?"  Miss Jill asked.  "I mean, it's like leaps and bounds from Friday to Monday."

I didn't even know what to say.  I was just so proud.

His afternoon aid stood there smiling.  A big, blushing grin.

His morning aid sent me a picture of his work earlier in the day.

Lili's name!

His special ed coordinator was blown away too.

"He wrote all the students' names," Miss Jill continued.  "A couple times. And he even wrote mine and came up to me all proud to say 'look what I did!'"

I know he's doing awesome.  I do his homework with him.  I read books with him.  I watch him progress. 

But to see other people beam at the accomplishments of my son fills me not just with pride, but with gratitude.  I am so grateful that he is a student in that school.  Not just because he's progressing, but because everybody notices.  Everybody is impressed.  And everybody is so proud of him.

The fact that little Brady P. shows significant progress in the areas he is so far behind in because of his extra chromosome, really touches the people that work with him.  Because they genuinely care about him.

His progress is their heart hard at work.

It's like a sprinkling of magic pixie dust blew through the schoolhouse and tickled everybody to the bone that day.  It's one of those moments where you can take a step back and say, "Wow.  We're really making a difference here."

And it means so much.  To everyone involved.

So, thank you to everyone involved!  You know who you are.  I'm not going to embarrass you anymore than that.

Thank you for caring.  And thank you for feeling proud of your efforts through a little boy who's going to help change the world.  Because you are giving him the tools to help him change it.

Family Expansion Pack

I'm going to get a little personal here.  

A little sappy even.  

I cried a few times when I wrote this one.  Perhaps we really have to feel our wounds in order to find deep gratitude.

I am grateful for my family.

Whether you know Brady P. and me personally, have been following our journey for years or are just joining, let me explain something about our family.

Aaron (Braeden's dad) and I separated two years ago.  Wow.  It's been two years?  We did the divorce and the whole thing.  

Brady P. lives with me pretty much full time.  He hangs out with his dad on weekends in the summertime while Aaron is  in Copper Harbor.  In the winter, they get to see each other during holidays, when weather travel permits or when we go for our annual Arkansas visit.

I just spoke about three people.  Only three.  Aaron, Braeden and me.

But our family is bigger than that.  And when people get divorced, it's like the families get divorced.  I can honestly say that I love the people in Aaron's family.  The Rogers side and the Zimmer side.  They are wonderful people, and we have had so much fun together!

I haven't seen most of them for that two years, and I miss them a lot.  Luckily, Brady P. gets to be a part of their family, so they can watch him grow up, and he can melt their hearts.

One of these days, I hope to show up at their Thanksgiving, though, because we always have a grand time!

Now here are the parts that I am really, truly grateful for.  With every cell of my being.

• Aaron and I are very civil with each other.
• Aaron's mom is still one of my very bestest friends!!!
• My parents and Aaron's parents still enjoy spending time together.
• Aaron's fiancé and I get along really well!
• Brady P. gets to watch us all share love and friendship.

Braeden with both Grammies!

Doesn't that make your heart smile?  It does mine!

I am so grateful for the little boy who came into our lives, full of unconditional love, to show us what really is important in this life.  We are all better because of it.

And do you want to know a beautiful thing?  Brady P. gets to be a big brother!!!

I am so excited that he gets to have a sibling!  I always wanted him to be a big brother, but I certainly didn't want it to come from me.  I'm so over it!

So, congratulations and thank you to Aaron and Kelsi for making Braeden into a big brother (coming this winter!).  Brady P. and Kelsi both think it's a girl.  I love it when Braeden says, "sister," when I ask him who's in Kelsi's belly.  

That little sister is a HUGE gift to Braeden.  I cried for a solid hour after I found out.  He deserves it so much!

Not only is this family, ever-expanding as it will be, always there for us when we need them and supportive in the ways they know how to be best, they still love and respect each other.

That is a gift as wonderful as a little sister.

Thank you to all my family, near and far.  You have helped to make us who we are.

The Little Things

Hi!

What are you doing right now?

Are you doing 100-million things to try to get through the day?  Slamming coffee while navigation through traffic and finding a good radio station to read this blog to?  

Are you sitting in your recliner with a cup of tea while looking out the window at the beauty of Mother Nature and taking a few deep breaths before you have your favorite part of the week -- reading this blog? 

Wink.

Neither one is right or wrong (however, the former is dangerous while driving, and I don't recommend it.).  They are different, and  they are results of choices we have made.

We are where we are in life, and that's where we are.  It's not good or bad.  It just is.

How we choose to look at it is the only part we can control.

When I first gave birth to Braeden, my life instantly went from a peaceful, "easy" pregnancy to a sudden chaotic state of emergency: an infant failing to thrive, constant research about the unknown, troubleshooting daily life, real-life lessons about learning how to be assertive to authority and organizing a constantly-changing schedule of events.  

All while enduring sleep deprivation.

(If you are interested in learning the specifics about all that, I invite you to read Digging for Light ~ A Memoir to Inspire Humanity.)

That was the hardest thing I ever did in my life.  But we did it.  We made it through.  Thank you to everyone who helped.  I could not have done it without you.

Do you know how I mentally got through it?

I focused on the fact that it would all be over someday.  I just knew it had to be over some day because Brady P. would grow up.  His heart would get fixed.  He would have to gain weight at some point.  We'd have to figure out the cause of his emergency fevers too.

I visualized him as a happy, healthy, strong one-year-old. 

Daily.

Each moment I realized he was still alive, I was grateful.  

I tried to focus on my gratitude. 

Even when I would call my mother, the nurse, in a panic because his temperature spiked to 103.2 again, she would say, "Amanda, if his heart is beating and he's breathing, then it's not that big of an emergency."

It seems like a dramatic way to endure life with a newborn, but she was right.  If he was breathing and his heart was beating, then chances were, he wasn't going to die at that moment.  I had time to figure things out.

So I would try to be grateful with that time.  And be panicked while trying to get him comfortable and stable.  You know, mom stuff.

How do we even reach the point that we can feel gratitude in times of adversity?  How can we find it in our busy everyday life?  

We have to slow the heck down.

And say thank you.

For instance, I am grateful for the following things, so I say:

I am grateful for all that I am, all that I have and all that I can be.  I am grateful to live in this beautiful, peaceful town.  I am grateful for my health and abilities to do the things I need to do each day... and more.  I am grateful for my son who has taught me a whole new level of gratitude and love.  I am grateful I have good food to eat.  I am grateful I am pursuing my writing, a talent and gift that I can share to help me with my purpose of raising the consciousness of humanity.

That's basically the gist of mine.

What's yours?

Do you already have a spiel?  Is this something new for you?

Well, either way, give it a try!

Everyday.

And see how your life improves.

Cuz really, it's just the little things that help us get through the day.

So I leave you with a picture of Brady P. seizing the moment and enjoying a frolic through the leaves.  If it was a video, you would see that he turns around and goes the other way once he gets to the end.  Haha.  Little man.

Knee deep in the leaves

Sloooooow It Down

The first hint of silver lining I got from Braeden's dad, Aaron, when we first discussed the news about Braeden having Down syndrome was when he said, "Well, he won't have to run the rat race."

True.

I hope.

Because I choose not to run the rat race either.  It's a race you can never truly win.  And as I raise that sweet little Brady P., he constantly reminds me, even by what he represents, to slow down.  Life is not a race.

We literally stop and smell the roses when we go past the big bushes at the post office.  He is so stinkin' cute when he crouches and sticks his little nose in them.

Sniffing the first rose of the year!

He takes the time to show me on his fingers which step he just climbed down.  One through eleven.  To me, it takes forever.  For him it is pride and accomplishment... every step of the way.

He chews every bite of food (well, almost every bite) with appreciation and satisfaction.

He still points at all the cars that go by, so I can tell him what color and what kind of car it is.  Oy, all the parked ones too.  

He is just there.  He is in the moment.  I love it because I get to be in the moment too.

How often do you take the time to slow down?  To breathe deeply.  To be grateful.  To take in the beauty around you.  To feel connected to where you are.

Do you ever do it?

I do it a lot.  And I now feel the most amazing, strong, true, peaceful and joyful that I ever have in my life!  Genuinely.  Without just smiling to cover up the sad parts of my life -- because there are none.  Sure, things can happen, but I choose how to react.  I choose whether I hold on to the pain or let it go.  And I choose what is next.

I know what I want out of life, and I will settle for nothing less.

I wanted a macro lens for my camera.  I knew that little piece of equipment would combine my love for wildflowers and colors with slowing down and really paying attention to the moment.  At a focus 25 times what the naked eye can see.

And now, my friend, now I will show you what I can do with that.

Inside a purple iris

Birdsfoot trefoil

Metallic streamer

Orange hawkweed

Crow feather

Do you see what these images do?  They force you to slow down and look at images we take for granted everyday.  Just objects.  Or weeds.

But it is my intention to stick the magic, uniqueness and beauty of these images right in your eyeball.  You can't deny the colors.  The shapes.  The detail.  And, on a lot of the pictures I'm taking, you can't even tell what it is a picture of!  It's like a mind warp as well.  Sober.

Anyway, I am stoked.  I'd like to keep sharing these images with people.  If I can get my act together (because I have nothing else going on, you know), I'd love to be able to print these captivations and sell them through my website, so people can enjoy them on their own wall.  I'll let you know if that ever happens.

In the meantime, just sit back, take a deep breath, and enjoy.