The Lucky 95%

I know I've touched on this before, but I have the kid who says hi to everyone.

He waves ecstatically to each vehicle that drives by when we are on a walk.

He waves and shouts, "Hiiiiii!" if he hears a car alarm go off or a car beeping when it locks.

He hugs his friends when he sees them.  Sometimes two or three times!  He even hugs strangers when the universe grants permission. He is no dummy. He is connected to more than we can see.

Right now he is six-and-a-half years old. I do not tell him that he can't say hi to everyone. I won't tell him that he can't give random people hugs (especially once the pandemic is over!). I will not hinder his innate, loving, accepting, inclusive behavior because that is not my place.

Someday, he will be an adult that does this.

How do I feel about that?

Kids are one thing, but as people become adults, things aren't so cute anymore.

When I was growing up, or, heck, any moment before Brady P. came into my life, I was afraid of people who said hi to everyone.

Afraid!

They just said "hi" and waved ecstatically, and I was afraid!

All I knew then was my perspective. I was obviously insecure with myself. I absolutely did not take the time to understand other people who seemed to be different than me.

Now I get to.

My previous experience gave me compassion for the people who don't say hi back to my super-friendly little boy. Most people do, by the way. Probably 95% of people are absolutely charmed by him.

The rest pretend they didn't hear him.

That used to be me!

But I can't think, "Geez, what a jerk!"

No!

I just get to think, "Yup. I used to be like that. Maybe they will understand someday."

But maybe they won't. Maybe it is not their journey, and I cannot judge. That is not my role.

Or any human's role!

We are all just here doing the best we can with what we have and what we know.

That's exactly what Brady P. is doing.

He lifts the hearts and spirits of 95% of the people he meets just by being himself.

It's true that you can't please everyone, but 95% isn't bad.

That other 5% may or may not figure it out someday. I was so ignorant about it that the type of person I used to turn my back to came out of my own body and now we spend nearly every day together.

Ummm, message received!

And now we get to share that message with others.

Sunday was World Down Syndrome Day. 3/21. It stands for Trisomy 21 which means there are 3 chromosomes on the 21st pair. Pretty clever, hey?

It's also the first day of spring, and this year in the harbor, it was glorious, so we had a little parade to celebrate!

You'll have to visit the blog to see the video. Thank you to my friend Steve for putting it together!

And considering the fact that I am still a nut that waves to random people, I will be proud of him when he does that forever too.

What to Choose...

Hello!

I might just be able to get here every other week for a bit, and that will be okay.  Sorry for any inconvenience it might cause.  I know you look forward to Wednesdays just for this post.  

Ha!

How are you doing?

Really!  How ARE you feeling?  Overall?  In everyday life?

I just want to remind you that, no matter how you are feeling right now, you are worthy.  You are worthy of love.  If you can freely give love to others, you deserve love freely from others.  

Unconditionally.

We all do.

That's why Brady P. is here.  To remind us of that.

Please don't let fear consume your life.  There is too much beauty and love out there to focus on something to be afraid of.  

There are two ways to act: out of love or out of fear.  Seriously. Those are the only two ways to make a decision!

Either you are hoping for the best and being your best in order to create the best outcome for all those involved, or you are holding back something due to fear.

Once I learned this (from a Gary Zukav book, I believe) I test it daily.

It has held true.  You can only act out of either love or fear.  Even if you say you are acting out of "rationale," your decision has to be either for the good of others or purely self-serving -- the latter is fear-based.

I don't know if I talked about this before, but it sure seems like a good time in our lives to bring it up again.

You don't even have to agree with me.  But you can test it as you go about your day!  If you find that you disagree, please tell me!  And if you find that it's true, and it has changed how you view life and make decisions on a daily basis, please tell me!

I don't know if you can tell, but I really want to help make a difference in this world.

I want you to be your best self, so I strive to be my best self.  I am trying to lead by example.  Remember, I am not perfect, and that's why I like to share my imperfections with you.  So you know I'm human too!

We all are!  

We're allowed to make mistakes! 

We're allowed to have hard days!  

We can only act according to the best of our ability in any given moment.  It is when we consciously make a decision to do the wrong thing even when we know what's right, that we feel negative repercussions.

It's true.  I test that out often too.  Instant karma, man.

But the consequences of doing the right things are amazing.  And the more you do the right thing, the better your life gets.  The more opportunities come your way.  The more your prayers are answered.

At least from what I've noticed.  That's why I'm telling you!

So test your choices for a bit: love or fear.  Ask yourself, "What am I choosing right now?  Am I being my best self?  I am I doing the right thing?  What if somebody was watching me do this right now?"

I'm not going to lie.  Often times, the right thing is the harder thing.  It takes more energy.  But what do you want to do with your life?  Move forward with the momentum of positivity or get stuck by doing the easy/convenient things that don't always get you anywhere?

The choice is yours, my friend.

Have a wonderful day!

"Dis" and "Dat" Ability

Today we are going to have a lesson.  Let me start with this:

What are you really good at?  Seriously, take a moment and think about it. Maybe you already know because you live out your gift passionately.  Maybe you are currently trying to figure it out.  Maybe you think you are hopeless, and you aren't good at anything.

But you are.  Keep looking.  Keep feeling.  Keep living.

What are you really good at?  What is your gift?  When did you figure this out?  Do you notice how good you feel when you get a chance to do it?  Do you notice how stifled and useless you feel when you don't get to do it?

I notice that with myself, and I notice it with Braeden.

We all can't do it all.  That's why we are all so different!  If we all did it all, we would all be really stressed out because that's a lot of pressure.  Instead, if we are able to harness the power of our talents and gifts, and use them daily, we are then able to thrive.  Not just live from day to day, but feel powerful and purposeful because we are doing what we love and do well.

Here is a little video to help illustrate this.

See?  We can't do it all, but we can do something.  Once we find out what our something is, we NEED to do it.  From our very core.  It is how we help others on this planet.  It makes us feel alive and worthy.

When I watch Braeden at school, it is apparent that he can't do all the things the other kids are doing.  He doesn't talk.  He can't eat his meatloaf with a fork all by himself.  He doesn't tell me when he needs to poop (or even admit that he just did it in his pants!).

However, I believe that he will be able to do all of these things some day.  These are merely milestones in a child's life.

There are other things that he can do that don't have to do with his age.  If he sees someone crying, he will either cry too, or give them a hug.  If you ask him to help you with something he is capable of, he will usually help happily.  When he smiles, your heart melts.  He is always very proud of himself for accomplishing something new or old.

Besides, he is a genius.

If you've been keeping up with this blog, you have read about many of the the things he can do.  Like, blow-your-mind kind of stuff for a three-year-old in general.

But genius and worldly knowledge aside, he is much more than that.  He brings a softness to this world.  He emanates a love that penetrates the darkest of hearts.  He shines a light so bright that it transformed my misguided thoughts instantly.

Brady P. dropping snow bombs on the porch

Just look at the light in those eyes.  He is pumped.  He drops that ice chunk over and over because I say "Katunk!" and he laughs.

Okay, so one more thing to tie this all together.

You have thought about what makes you awesome and special on this planet.  I have told you what makes Braeden awesome and special.

Now I want you to think about someone you know who you may have previously deemed "disabled."  Or less than a person.  Or perhaps not even worthy of life.  I bet you can think of someone.  Even saints have probably felt this way about someone.

Next think about why you thought that way about that person.   Is there something you don't understand about them?  How did they get in their current position?  What if you were in their shoes?

Okay, there's a little glimpse into finding compassion.

Now for the big question.  What do you think their gift could be?  Have you seen it yourself?  What potential do they have? Can you help bring it out in them?  Can somebody else?

AND...

Can you focus on that?  You can notice where they are now, yes, but know that they are here for something greater.

Just like Braeden.

Just like me.

Just like everybody.

Just like you.